Raising girl’s self-esteem and grit: Un-Words critical for girls to embrace


There are some crucial qualities girls need to develop self-esteem and grit. I described four of these in a previous blog, and today I am adding four more “un-words” to the list.

Unaffected: The happiest girls I know are the ones who don’t care what other people think about them. They don’t give their power away by allowing disrespectful words or gossip to hurt their feelings, and they make decisions based upon their internal compass regardless of what their peers and the culture tells them.

Unlimited: “If you hear a voice within you say,” You cannot paint,” then by all means paint and the voice will be silenced.”  Van Gogh

Educate your daughter about stereotype limits society tries to impose upon them, unrealistic standards of perfection, and narrow definitions about motherhood and career. Guide them to define what “having it all” means for them, and then encourage them follow their heart.

Unwavering: One of the most important qualities girls can leave home with is grit: the ability to persevere despite hardship and challenges. Allow them to get frustrated, problem-solve, dig deep, and overcome obstacles in order to develop the conviction that they can achieve their goals and dreams.

Unconditional: Having people in your corner who unconditionally love and support you allows girls to believe in themselves during times of self-doubt and insecurity. When a girl looks at her parents, what they need mirrored back is, “I believe in you”, especially when they are struggling or making mistakes. Parents and mentors can hold a higher vision of girls when they can’t yet see it in themselves.

Unreachable, undisturbed and uninterrupted, unleashed, understanding, unaffected, unlimited, unwavering, and unconditional are not just words; they are a way of being that will allow your daughters to transcend any limiting stereotypes, peer pressure, and cultural standards. Encourage these virtues through your words, actions, modeling, and the way that you parent.

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